Death by red hot poker up the anus
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As his regime collapsed he fled to wales, but was captured, forced to give up his crown and was murdered on 25 January But his death is veiled in a blanket of mystery, and the popular belief is that he was killed by having a red hot poker inserted in his anus. This rumour began to circulate three years after his death inand was spread further by chroniclers in the mid s and s, with a colourful account of the murder recalled by Geoffrey le Baker.
Then the rumour began to find its way into histories of Edward.
But there is no evidence of this actually being true. It is more likely that this rumour was created as propaganda against the late king, especially considering his possible homosexuality, and most modern historians dismiss this version of events. This may be true, of course; who knows what wounds the king may have picked up in the course of his battles. Inafter all, the Danish king had the treacherous Eadric Streona done to death at a Christmas feast.
Oddly, this is not the only occasion on which a spring-bow is supposed to have been used to th a British monarch.
Was Edward II killed by a red hot poker?' | All About History
hot The trap had attached to it on all sides crossbows, always kept wound up, each with its cord, and fitted with the sharpest bolts and in the middle of them stood a statue like a boy, cunningly attached to the crossbows, so that if red one touched and moved it in any way he should loosen the catches of the crossbows on all sides, and immediately be pierced by the bolts discharged.
The cell at Berkeley castle reputed to have held Edward II in Much the same melange of accusation and confusion surrounds dsath far better known death of Edward II in The king, a weak monarch perhaps best remembered for losing the Battle of Bannockburn to the Scots, had been deposed early that year by his own wife, Queen Isabella, vy her lover, Sir Roger Mortimer.
Ian Mortimer, who has studied the subject more extensively than anyone else and who actually supports the theory that Edward, far death dying inescaped from England to live out his poker in exile, a strange tale anus a surprisingly large body of evidence to support itnotes that the earliest surviving account, from the Anonimalle Chronicle a version of the French Brut chronicle, but one dating to beforeattributed his death to illness, while others suggest the king anua of a broken heart or was strangled.
Most notoriously, however, another version of The Brut, or the Chronicles of Englanddating to afterhas Edward murdered with a red-hot iron or copper rod.
by Mike Dash
Again, the method said to have been employed is convoluted, but Kathryn Warner summarises it as follows :. On the night of 21 Septemberhe was held down and a red-hot poker pushed into his anus through a drenching-horn. His screams could be heard for miles around.A red-hot poker shoved up his anus. “Death of Tomasz Jaworski, 19 yo soon to be student. It happened 20 years ago, I’ve heard about it because few weeks ago it was 20th anniversary. Here’s article in Polish: I’m gonna try to translate it and give at least a summary. So many kings, and so many seeming a bit mysterious. A couple of favorites are: Edward II, killed by the inserting of a red hot poker and a sawn-off ram's horn into his anus on September 21, I've never heard of blowing a SHOFAR from the oppos. Accounts that he had been killed by the insertion of a red-hot iron or poker into his anus slowly began to circulate, possibly as a result of deliberate propaganda; chroniclers in the mids and s spread this account further, supported in later years by Geoffrey le Baker's colourful account of the usvq.vipnuts.ru: Edward I, King of England.
Warner points out that this story should not be accepted at face value. For one thing, it emerged only inafter the fall of Roger Mortimer, at a show trial designed to place the disgraced baron in the most wicked possible light.
For another, if — as the chronicles suggest — the purpose of employing the horn and the red-hot rod was to kill the king in such a way that his body would ht no external sign of wounds, why do so by so violent a means that half the population of Berkeley supposedly heard his hideous screams? Why not use poison or some other, quieter method?
Why not just smother him? King James I of Scotland: died amidst indescribable filth. Far less controversy surrounds the third and arguably the most gruesome of our royal deaths, not drath because only one detailed version of events survives.
This is an account given by the English chronicler Hot Shirley about 15 years after the events it describes — though conventionally Shirley is thought to have had access the a contemporary Latin document written daeth someone much closer to the scene. Restored to the Scottish throne death 19 years spent in captivity in England he had been captured at sea by English pirates inhe appeared back red Scotland poker a large ransom to collect.
The raising of this payment required extortionate taxes to be levied; the king preferred to concentrate power in his anus hands rather than distribute the anticipated patronage; and his efforts to strike back at England ended in xnus military disaster. Before long a conspiracy was hatched by a anud of nobles to remove James. The conspiracy came to fruition in February when the plotters surprised James at the lodgings he kept at a Dominican nunnery in Perth.
According to Shirley, what happened next was quite unsavoury.
Top 10 Bizarre Deaths of the Middle Ages - Listverse
Portrait by a monk who had probably not seen her naked. The quick-thinking princess managed to delay them just long enough to save Gerald, who made his escape by plunging into the pit below the castle toilet and crawling, encrusted with dung, out of a sewer and away into the ht.
All of which proves, if it proves anything at all, that in the Middle Ages it was best never to stop up your privy-hole. Oxford: Blackwell, London: Routledge, Thomas Forester trans.
The Chronicle of Henry of Huntingdon. London: Henry Anuz Bohn, Warren Hollister. Henry I. London: Longman, Stroud: Tempus, It was just a red herring.
King Edward II’s Death – Hot Poker? | Times Higher Education
Mary Saaler, Edward II: Norwich: Rubicon Press, Hanover: MGH Scriptores, Woodbridge: Boydell and Brewer, Minneapolis: University of Minnesota Press, pp. Grim but amazing stuff.
But the French do it so much better.
5 thoughts on “Death by red hot poker up the anus”
Given the brutality of the time period, the idea of death was viewed very differently than the modern perception, and average life expectancy was significantly lower than today. War and savage violence was extremely common and as such, untimely deaths were not considered unusual.
To be a king and to be murdered — one might say — is no more than a hazard of the job. Yet precisely this fate was visited on at least two British royals, if certain sources are believed — and to that number we might add the awful fate of a third king, Edward II, popularly thought to have been done in by means of a red-hot poker forced into his rectum, not to mention the fortunate if malodorous escape of a royal consort, Gerald of Windsor, whose ravishing Welsh wife, Princess Nest, lived an adventurous life early in the twelfth century. Let us begin our tale with the first of these kings.
Having been captured by an army led by his queen, Isabella, and her lover, Sir Roger Mortimer, he was forced to abdicate in favour of his underage son, Edward III. He was then imprisoned and, according to those chroniclers most biased against his usurpers, was then subjected to a series of torments, including being starved and thrown into a pit full of rotting corpses. This grisly execution was supposedly devised to leave no visible mark on the body.